Why Giving Up Wine Is The Power Move For Women Aging
/If you’re over 40 and just not feeling like yourself, that’s ok, same here. But here’s lots of reasons why ditching wine will be your total midlife glow up
“Mindfulness without alcohol isn’t about becoming a Zen monk. It’s about regaining access to your own life.”
Table of Contents
A new approach to alcohol & aging
Being in your 40s these days means you’re part of the younger Gen-X or elder millennial cohort taking on aging in a way that’s never been discussed before. This time in our lives brings a unique set of challenges and opportunities and we’re not taking it sitting down like our mothers did.
For many women, this phase of life involves managing the complexities of raising older children, supporting aging parents, possibly becoming an empty nester and maybe questioning all your life choices and satisfaction in your career.
Amidst these responsibilities, we’re all trying to prioritize personal well-being by eating our protein, walking with weighted vests and ‘lifting heavy’. But the most impactful power move you can make (and also the most controversial) that yields substantial immediate benefits is taking a pause and reevaluating if you really need that glass of wine or not.
Whether it’s at home with streaming on the TV, or at a ‘drinks night’ with former coworkers, reducing or eliminating alcohol intake during this stage of life helps heal and enhance mental, emotional, and physical health.
Mental and Emotional Wellness
Midlife Satisfaction: A Mixed Bag
Research indicates that midlife can be a pivotal period for personal fulfillment. A study published in the Journal of Aging Studies (2021) found that life satisfaction often dips during midlife, with declines observed in measures such as happiness and worthwhileness, reaching a low point around ages 50–54. This suggests that nearly half of individuals in this age bracket may experience decreased life satisfaction, highlighting the importance of lifestyle choices that support mental well-being.
Conversely, the research also shows that having an increased level of purpose and holding onto it is an important predictor of better physical health in midlife - a double whammy for any woman watching their older kids become independent and move away from home.
Stress & The Midlife Balancing Act
Women in their 40s often find themselves in the "sandwich generation," simultaneously caring for teenagers and aging parents. This dual responsibility adds stress, emotional fatigue and sheer exhaustion from constantly caretaking others, while often lacking adequate support for themselves.
If the stress seems overwhelming, it is. Perimenopause is fundamentally a period of hormonal fluctuations and losing the protective shield of estrogen. One outcome of this is a heightened sensitivity to stress loads.
The daily demands of caregiving means a desperation for stress relief, making it so much easier to pop open a bottle of wine and relax on the couch.
Unfortunately, as you’re zoning out in front of the latest true crime show, alcohol is creating even more stress through an increase in cortisol levels, the body's primary stress hormone. This excess of cortisol will most likely peak and crash in the middle of the night, causing poor quality sleep and intensifying stress and anxiety for several days.
Elevated cortisol levels have also been linked to various health issues, including reduced bone density and cognitive impairments, all things we want to avoid to manage stress in a healthy way, and increase our longevity.
So, while a glass of wine might seem like a convenient stress reliever, it's neither a power move nor a self-care strategy that enables you to be stress-free in the face of daunting challenges.
Aging Powerfully Without Alcohol
Alcohol Metabolism in Perimenopause
If you’re in your 40s or beyond and find you’re feeling tipsy after one glass of wine and tolerating alcohol less and less, you’re not alone.
“I don’t know any woman who’s in her menopausal journey who is processing alcohol the way she used to; the tolerance seems to be going down. ”
“This is not something new,” said Dr. Lauren Streicher, a professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Northwestern University, and host of Dr. Streicher’s Inside Information: The Menopause Podcast. “I’ve been doing this for decades, and women have often said to me, ‘Boy, I just can’t drink anymore. It makes my hot flashes worse. I’m already sleeping terribly. It makes my sleep worse.’”
The truth is that we just don’t metabolize alcohol like we used to.
With age, the body's water content decreases. Since alcohol disperses via the water level in your blood, less water means higher blood alcohol concentrations after consuming the same amount of alcohol.
Additionally, the liver enzymes responsible for breaking down that innocent glass of wine become less efficient over time, leading to slower alcohol metabolism and prolonged effects.
Drunker faster, but hungover sooner and longer? No thanks.
The Power Move: Benefits of Giving Up Wine
Midlife Glow-Up Is Real
Are you looking in the mirror and suddenly finding your skin texture has changed, your eczema is more stubborn than usual and no amount of sunscreen is helping the rosacea? One thing every woman who quits drinking will tell you is that her skin started to age backwards, and even start to glow a little.
UK beauty editor Donna Francis, who is quietly revolutionizing natural midlife beauty, quit drinking and at the five month mark she says she underestimated just what an impact removing alcohol would do for her skin health.
“Even I underestimated the impact that sobriety would have on my skin. I wake up with less creases. It feels and looks more nourished. Lifted. Glowier. I have less breakouts and it just behaves so much better!”
PHOTOS COPYRIGHT DONNA FRANCIS: FACEBOOK.COM
There’s a laundry list of things alcohol does to your skin, including dehydration and inflammation. So if you’re looking for a quick win, or at least looking to see or feel a difference within a few weeks, it will be your skin healing. It’s like a miracle pill that keeps getting better and better the longer you stay sober curious!
Improved Sleep Quality
While alcohol may initially aid in falling asleep, it disrupts sleep patterns and reduces the quality of rest. Research from the National Sleep Foundation shows that alcohol reduces REM sleep, the most restorative phase, leading to daytime fatigue and impaired cognitive function. A study published in Alcoholism: Clinical & Experimental Research found that even moderate drinking before bedtime can decrease sleep quality by up to 39%.
“A study in Menopause: The Journal of the North American Menopause Society found that alcohol consumption worsens night sweats and hot flashes”
For women in perimenopause and menopause, this disruption is even more pronounced. A study in Menopause: The Journal of the North American Menopause Society found that alcohol consumption worsens night sweats and hot flashes, two of the most common symptoms of this life stage. Additionally, declining estrogen levels already contribute to sleep disturbances, and alcohol further exacerbates these effects by increasing cortisol levels and reducing melatonin production, making restful sleep even harder to achieve.
By abstaining from that glass of wine, individuals often experience more restorative sleep, leading to better overall health, increased daytime energy, and improved cognitive performance.
Enhanced Self-Discovery
Sobriety may not be the goal for a lot of women, but completely removing alcohol for even a short period really demonstrates how this specific lifestyle choice can provide greater clarity and self-awareness than almost any other 'self-care' tool - with the exception of meditation.
Women in midlife often struggle with their identity as their children become less needy in the teenage years, and the duality of a woman's family vs career existence starts to come into razor sharp clarity. The struggle of looking in the mirror and not recognizing yourself compounds the problem of who am I?
In yoga, one of the goals is to create space and open up, and in a similar way, giving up wine immediately starts to create fresh delicious space and open up areas of your life that weren't there before. Without the numbing effects of alcohol, it's easier to connect with your true self, and an ability to ask the tough questions and explore dreams, passions and goals in a way that isn't there when you're distracted by alcohol.
As one individual shared after quitting alcohol:
"I gained self-respect and appreciated smaller joys in life, stating that sobriety helped me like myself again."
Reclaiming Time
Reducing or eliminating wine consumption in the evenings can free up time previously spent drinking or recovering from its effects. There’s a strange ‘turning a blind eye’ effect in most people when it comes to this specific power move. Anyone will argue that relaxing on the couch isn’t wasting time, it’s recovery and relaxation. The issue arises when that one glass of wine relaxes you so much that other things on the ‘to-do’ list are easily dismissed in favour of lounging. There is less resistance in the tired brain, when it can succumb to the glow of a glass of wine instead of a Target run or groceries.
For someone with a real substance use disorder, and is going through a sober recovery journey, the amount of free time found is voluminous enough sometimes to start a new business, take up a side hustle or start running ultra-marathons. For the average woman who wants to power up and gives up her evening wine ritual, the reclaimed time is both mental and physical. One less stop at Total Wine on the way home, half an hour earlier to bed instead of nibbling on snacky snacks in the kitchen, or time found to get things crossed off the list you might have been too tired to tackle after that glass of wine.
Role Modeling: A Positive Example
Children don't just listen to what we say—they watch what we do. A growing body of research confirms that parental modeling has a powerful impact on children's behavior, particularly around substance use. A 2010 study in the Journal of Adolescent Health found that adolescents are significantly more likely to engage in alcohol use if their parents drink regularly, even in moderate amounts. By contrast, children of parents who abstain or drink very occasionally are more likely to delay initiation of alcohol and consume less overall as they grow older.
But the stakes are even higher in communities where alcohol misuse is normalized or used to cope with systemic stress—especially among Black and Latina women, who may face compounded cultural and social pressures. For women in these communities, breaking the cycle isn't just about health—it's about legacy.
“Culturally rooted preventioncan shift entire community norms over time.”
In many BIPOC households, the message around alcohol use may be shaped by survival, generational trauma, and silence. Drinking becomes a coping mechanism handed down through generations—not necessarily because it's celebrated, but because it was the only escape available. Choosing to disrupt that pattern is a radical act of healing.
Studies on intergenerational trauma and substance use suggest that when a parent consciously changes their relationship with alcohol, it can improve outcomes not just for their children, but for future generations. A report from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) emphasizes that culturally rooted prevention—like changing how we model alcohol use at home—can shift entire community norms over time.
So if this is you and you’re questioning your wine habit, you’re not just changing your own story. You’re planting the seed of resilience for your kids.
And that? That’s generational wealth—the kind that lives in the mind, the body, and the spirit.
Emotional Stability
Alcohol can impair judgment and exacerbate mood swings, and any woman who has had a fight with her spouse after bottomless brunch will have lots of examples of this. Those mimosas unfortunately are fun at the time, but your dopaminergic transport system is crashing by the time you get home.
Women who are fully sober, or even just sober curious, often relate they’ve experienced greater emotional stability in conflicts with both family and friends, the peaks and valleys of the roller coaster are not as high (you’ve downgraded to the ghoster coaster instead of the Skyrider) which fosters healthier interactions and more meaningful connections with others.
Mindfulness and Presence
Sobriety enhances mindfulness, allowing individuals to be more present in their daily lives and interactions. Alcohol can dull emotions and create a sense of detachment, making it harder to engage fully with loved ones and personal experiences. Removing alcohol from the equation fosters deeper emotional connections, improved communication, and a greater appreciation for the present moment.
But it’s more than just being physically present—it’s about being emotionally available. When you’re not riding the ups and downs of blood sugar crashes, disrupted sleep, and nervous system dysregulation, your ability to tune in deepens. You hear what your kids are really saying. You notice the shift in your friend’s tone. You feel your own intuition more clearly.
In sobriety, small moments stretch out. Time slows down. You begin to live inside your life instead of watching it through a foggy window. There’s a quiet magic in lighting a candle and actually tasting your tea. In noticing the sky change color while you’re walking the dog. In laughing—genuinely, freely—because you’re not checking out halfway through the experience.
Mindfulness without alcohol isn’t about becoming a Zen monk. It’s about regaining access to your own life. And for many women in midlife, that grounded presence becomes the very foundation for making empowered choices, building stronger boundaries, and reconnecting with joy.
Choosing to give up wine in your 40s is more than just a lifestyle change; it's a strategic decision that can profoundly impact your mental, emotional, and physical well-being.
As one woman in my circle put it recently, “Sometimes it’s water, because mama’s got goals.” It was funny—she said it half-joking while holding her Stanley cup at a ladies night—but there was something powerful in it. We’re not here to escape anymore. We’re here to feel it all. To remember what peace tastes like. To show up for ourselves and the people we love without needing to numb the edges.
And maybe that’s what this whole thing is about. Not about giving something up—but finally choosing to stay. To stay present. To stay soft. To stay sharp. To stay in your life.
Conclusion
Choosing to give up wine in your 40s is more than just a lifestyle change; it's a strategic decision that can profoundly impact your mental, emotional, and physical well-being. By removing alcohol from the equation, women can experience improved sleep, greater emotional stability, enhanced self-awareness, and stronger relationships. Additionally, setting a positive example for younger generations and embracing mindfulness can lead to a more fulfilling and impactful life. Ultimately, giving up wine in your 40s isn't about restriction—it's about empowerment, clarity, and taking control of your future.
